Saturday, November 7, 2009

my morning....

(this white car is about to hit 2 ft of water...yippee. I am taking shelter via the underpass, scooter illegalishly wedged off to the right. :: phone cam not as good as L's...)


hmph, I had a rough couple of hours, which involved awesome wind, rain, flooding, getting stuck, likely ruining my boots (!@#$), soaking a library book and freezing...all of this fun was had on my scooter. Attention, 1-2 foot huge puddles and scooters do not mix. If I could of had picked it up and threw it, I would've. The below cheered me right up. It might well become my new silly standby, displacing this genius. Maybe not.


Note: I didn't actually want tc's puss on smear either, but hopefully it's worth pain.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

from above



Just a couple more images to entice potential visitors... The view from my landlord's porch, which I am granted full access to whenever he's out of town. No cracks about smog, please--that haze is actually just due to poor photo quality since these were taken on my cell phone. Imagine what pictures from a real camera would look like! Then imagine what reality would look like! Then come visit!

*L

Monday, November 2, 2009

Sassy captcha





what is with this sassy captcha? I had better not be getting the flu, and really I feel fine. But now that you made me type it-twice- and what is with that? Well, one wonders.

yours in health,
ksmear

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

wolf

I don't really have to say anything about this, do I? Even you, J, must have seen those damn t-shirts by now...
*L

Monday, October 19, 2009

You should see my new house


Even though it's not really mine, and is only a part of a house.
Here are some promised pictures to give an impression of my new home. There is also a bathroom, kitchen and dining area that don't photograph well. Please note that the living room is actually very bright and flooded with all-day sunshine, but I chose the pictures that make it look dark because the colors look richer. And the darkness obscures the disorderly appearance of the room at the time of photo-taking.


I have an office area set up to the left of the room below, but it was way messy.


Also note the extreme wood panelling in the bedroom. The dining area and hallway are also covered with it. Unfortunately, it's not the prettiest wood you've ever seen, but whatever, flaws add character. I guess.


There are pretty flowers outside the bedroom windows. They attract butterflies and hummingbirds, which certainly entertains the cat.


The garden, with a little corner of my patio visible, with a lonely-looking chair. Don't be fooled! There is another chair and a table behind the Giant Bird of Paradise.


Um, that is a hot tub on the right. And the downtown skyline in the background. It looks much closer in person. It's pretty much ridiculous.


Perk not pictured: my landlord has an adorable, affectionate Rottweiler who I hang out with sometimes on my lunch break. I love him, even though he clearly wants to eat my cat.

Smearers, come visit!

*L




Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Garden Tip #1

Apparently, I will do anything for a decent tomato crop. Even fertilize with my own urine, which according to Finnish scientists makes ..."a reasonably potent fertilizer..."
and made for equally tasty fruit. (with our without the wood ash)
Intriguing ... but I am not all that excited about storing my urine for six months prior to using it as a fertilizer, that could get awkward.

-k

Thursday, September 17, 2009

he's back


I've been regrettably inactive in the smearing lately, but finally know what I should report here: Werner Herzog's latest movie, Bad Lieutenant. Maybe you've heard of the original Bad Lieutenant, directed by Abel Ferrara and starring Harvey Keitel, or maybe you haven't, like Werner Herzog. Hearing that his film was being remade, Ferrara commented:
I wish these people [Herzog and star Nicholas Cage, presumably. Yes, Nicholas Cage. Eh?] die in hell. I hope they're all in the same streetcar and it blows up.
To which Herzog responded,
I have no idea who Abel Ferrara is... I've never seen a film by him... Is he Italian? Is he French? Who is he?
Hilarious! All of it!
The (Herzog) movie itself also sounds hilarious. I cannot wait. Look at that ridiculous cast. With crazy Werner directing them. Cannot wait!

*L

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Safe Sex with Hitler


hep hep. This ad is getting pulled rechts und links and lots of flack in general. I am not sure how effective it is going to be, but if just being disturbing is the goal, then yes.
k

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Dr. Roxanne's Revenge

...this made me fuzzier than usual... an 80s female rapper earned her phd and and gets Warner music to finance her education due to a forgotten clause in an old contract. yip yip.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

I know what would be a good idea...


I just couldn't help myself. This was too good. j